Monday, March 2, 2009

Boston Red Sox: Your Kung Fu Is Weak, But Youk Fu Is Mighty

I will admit, when I saw the Red Sox photo day shots a couple of days ago, I was shocked and somewhat appalled to see that The Beard that Should Not Be had been paired down to a simple set of Hivlar-esque biker bars.

I decided to hold off on any judgement until I had seen this new look in action, and last night's game was the perfect opportunity. Needless to say, I loved what I saw.


Youk & Shaq: Separated at birth?

Kevin Youkilis has become the shorter, lighter, whiter version of Shaq. For anyone who saw his conversation with Donny-O (related to Barry -O?) after he was taken out of the Sox' first televised Spring Training game last night, it is undeniable.



The bald head, the Fu Manchu (or biker bars) mustache, and the massive size of his head tipped it off to the point where a slightly intoxicated SMC couldn't stop staring at it. The final straw came when he called his facial hair a "Youk Fu." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Youkuille O'Neal.

The night did get off on a somber note as a solo Don Orsillo (wearing a NESN polo, not the gaudy Hawaiian shirt we were hoping for) told the millions watching that Remy is out with an "infection." While he was missed, Joe McDonald, Mike Dee, and Sean McAdam filled in nicely. It still won't be spring until we get to hear Remy make some kind of bad joke in an attempt to poke fun at his broadcast partner.


The other revealing part of the evening's festivities (yes, it was a party. We had an indoor BBQ as a celebration of spring, with hot dogs, baked beans, pickles and beer) was the interview of Tito. Showing of his new specs, the manager told Orsillo how great it had been this spring, and took some veiled shots at the old left fielder in the process.

"It's been a professional camp. Guys do whatever you ask," he said.


Coupled with the fact that he looks about ten years younger than he did at this point last year, it's pretty plain to see that the manager is in a good place with one of the large stresses of his job currently unemployed in California. This is why we love Tito.

As for the game, and the earlier one vs BC, there's not too much to report. It was Feb. 25, but Beckett, Buchholz, Masterson, Ramirez, and Delcarmen all looked great, Lopez was an adventure, and Junichi was entertaining. Wake got knocked around a bit but Bard caught the ball. The bats are getting used to facing live pitching and the Sox are down 1-0 in the Mayor's Cup.

But it was Feb. 25, and none of this actually matters.

Really? I can do better?
Really? I can do better?

On The Shortstop Watch: The other day on Dennis and Callahan, Lugo said something that gives me hope for the upcoming season and even, possibly, for Lugo redeeming himself, and Theo for signing him. He said that he feels like he owes the team something, and that he owes the city something because he is a better baseball player than he has been.

Since he is likely to be the starting shortstop come opening day (due as much to the fact that Little Jeddy is a more versatile player who can back up all four infield positions, while Julio can only effectively play short, as anything else) it is nice to know that he doesn't just want to cash a paycheck, but wants to prove that he was brought in for a reason. I like him a little bit more now.

Sox play the Pirates at 1 p.m. today, with Lester, Saito, and Okajima taking the mound. WBC guys will be leaving to join their national teams on Sunday, so enjoy Youkuille, Dusty Pete, Lopez, and Ortiz while you can.

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